


Worth It!

by ewagan, sannlykke



Category: Kuroko no Basuke | Kuroko's Basketball
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Worth It, Gen, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-12-24
Updated: 2019-12-24
Packaged: 2021-02-26 01:33:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,575
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21935278
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ewagan/pseuds/ewagan, https://archiveofourown.org/users/sannlykke/pseuds/sannlykke
Summary: If anyone had during college told Kuroko Tetsuya he’d be having the time of his life working for a media conglomerate specializing in bullshitting and memeing the entire Internet during his late twenties, he’d have stared blankly at them and shaken his head.Chapter 1: Tea
Relationships: Aomine Daiki/Kise Ryouta, Kuroko Tetsuya & Momoi Satsuki
Comments: 1
Kudos: 20





	Worth It!

> i. お茶

If anyone had during college told Kuroko Tetsuya he’d be having the time of his life working for a media conglomerate specializing in bullshitting and memeing the entire Internet during his late twenties, he’d have stared blankly at them and shaken his head.

Of course, he’d have been wrong. But it isn’t time to speculate about coulda shoulda woulda-beens; he’s supposed to be manning the camera.

Still, Akashi should have been the one here, being the only one in the office who knows remotely anything about tea. He would’ve made a great pair with Midorima, had this been a show with rotating hosts. But considering Akashi’s many conflicting appointments and Midorima’s current… predicament with Takao’s show, all Kuroko has left to work with is Aomine complaining very loudly to the camera with gems such as,

“It was a _joke_ , I said Tasty should make a new show called _Kitchen on Fire_ and—”

“... _Aominecchi_ , that’s no way to treat a lady!”

Which is only leading Kuroko to consider the likelihood of his getting fired for dumping the now lukewarm tea over both of their heads.

* * *

Kise had been the one to come up with the idea of Worth It a few months ago, back when Kuroko had been working on such gems as _Are dog psychics real?_ and _How to become invisible_. There are _so_ many food shows out there, he’d pointed out excitedly to Akashi and Momoi and Kuroko (who hadn’t even been in the room but could hear Kise’s voice from all the way across the hall), but none of them comparing them like _this_.

“It’ll be _great_ ,” he’d said, charismatic as all hell. Kuroko thought he just wanted to eat fancy food on Buzzfeed’s coin, which admittedly wasn’t a bad idea. Fuck the system and all that.

He just didn’t think _he’d_ be eventually dragged into it. Or Aomine, for that matter.

* * *

The proprietor’s talking about their house-blend matcha now, carefully stirring the tea in a way that’s half-nervous and mostly trying hard to keep Aomine from constantly trying to sniff it. _Sniff it._ Kise’s a natural in front of the camera from what Kuroko’s seen in his other videos, always flirting or making some comment at the screen for the views, but this whole tugging at Aomine’s shirt, looking over at Kuroko wildly thing—

This is a mess.

“I’m going to have to cut this out later, you know,” he says flatly as he turns the camera towards the open kitchen instead for yet another pan scene. At least one of these will be usable, hopefully.

Aomine finally relents under Kuroko’s wilting gaze, laying his hands flat on the table where Kuroko can see them and leaning pointedly away from the proprietor, like he knows exactly what Kuroko means.

It lasts all of two minutes, because that's when the pretty girl who had been introduced as Kisa-chan brings the wagashi out, and Aomine is ogling her like he has never ever heard of manners or propriety in his life.

Honestly, Kuroko’s not sure he ever has. It would certainly explain _some_ things.

Kise is cooing over at how lovely the sweets are while the proprietor has finally finished mixing the tea, and is presenting it in some lovely tea bowls that could rival the ones Midorima’s family owns. She explains the ceremony to them, and Kise is nodding earnestly while Aomine’s attention is still on Kisa-chan, despite Kise’s less than subtle attempt to kick him while in seiza.

Kuroko thinks about having to edit this footage into a manageable fifteen minute video, and regrets all his life choices up to this point. He zooms in on the wagashi instead, because at least those can't betray him by behaving badly.

“ _Aominecchi!_ ” Kise is hissing, even as he plasters on that charming smile that's responsible for at least six months of misery for Kuroko. The proprietor watches anxiously as they both try the tea, Kise making effusive comments about how lovely the tea is, asking more about where the tea came from while Aomine is frowning at the tea bowl, like it has somehow betrayed him.

By now, Kuroko has developed a sixth sense for trouble, and maybe another three more wherever Aomine is concerned. The camera is panning over the wagashi and the teapot, and Kise is turning to Aomine with a brilliant smile on his face.

“How are you finding the tea, Aominecchi?” Kise chirps. Kuroko pans the camera to them, where Aomine is still staring at the tea like it has wronged him, and Kuroko is dreading whatever is going to come out of his mouth. He’s only hoping that Aomine doesn’t say it tastes like ass, which is entirely too possible.

“It’s very,” The struggle is visible, and Kuroko can see Kise’s smile grow strained at the corners. He hides it by taking another sip of his tea. Kuroko’s not sure this is the wisest choice of action, but the entire production has been a car crash in slow motion, and at least Momoi will suffer with him later. “Green,” Aomine says finally. “Like Midorima’s hair, like if maybe, you boiled it or something.”

Kise sputters, hastily putting down down his bowl and covering his mouth as he coughs. Kuroko’s not sure if Kise is laughing or choking at this point, but the camera is rolling and this is happening to him. Aomine’s slapping Kise on the back and Kise is trying to bat him away, and the table is shuddering because they're both terrible at sitting in seiza. Midorima would be scandalised if he could see the disaster Aomine and Kise are making of the tea ceremony, especially now Kise is bent over in half and Aomine is half on top of him, trying to make sure Kise hasn't finally given up the ghost.

Kuroko watches with detachment as the tea spills over the table and how it narrowly avoids dripping onto the tatami when Kise practically flings himself over the table to wipe it up, notes the dismayed look on the proprietor’s face as Aomine accidentally drops his bowl trying to put the table to rights. This is happening to him, and Kuroko wonders what he must have done in his past life to deserve this.

As much as he wants to disappear on the spot as he is wont to do when times like these arise, Kuroko’s professionalism prevails; he continues filming without a word as Kise, his face a very slight tinge of pink, apologizes to the proprietor as the table is wiped clean. Aomine only narrowly averts a complete PR disaster by catching Kuroko’s disappointed look at the last minute and following suit.

(It’s probably not enough for Momoi to let him off with just a stern talking-to, but at this point Kuroko will take what he can get.)

“Kurokocchi, your turn!”

Oh—right, this is a thing. Kise’s smiling so wide at him Kuroko’s almost afraid his face might crack open, which is only slightly less horrifying than the thought of Aomine doing anything of note again for the rest of this episode. At least Kise doesn’t look like he’d almost just died on camera anymore.

Kuroko scoots into the seat Aomine (rather unwillingly) vacates. He looks down at the lightly-steaming tea and the nice granite-colored cup and the plate of delicate pink and white wagashi, fresh from the kitchens. Kise’s looking at him with all the hopefulness of a puppy eager for its owner’s praise and Kuroko feels a little lightheaded.

He takes a sip of the tea, and it tastes like ass.

“It’s amazing,” he tells the camera, and Aomine tactfully does not bang his head on the wall this time.

* * *

Kise is shaking his arm and Kuroko sways, but otherwise remains unmoved by how violently Kise is grabbing at him. They’re watching the uncut video play out on the projector, and Midorima’s face is turning whiter and whiter as events progress. Momoi has a death glare fixed on Aomine, and Akashi—

Well, Akashi is simply watching, his face inscrutable. It’s rather terrifying really, but Kuroko isn't taking any responsibility for anything that has happened. His task was to record and he has done an admirable job of it, if he says so himself. Even if what he was recording leaves much to be desired.

“I daresay we’ll never be able to step foot in that teahouse again,” Akashi comments as Kise and Aomine hunch over on screen, positions extremely compromising due the camera’s angle. “Or let either of you anywhere that requires manners.” He arches an eyebrow, and Kise shrinks. Aomine at least has the decency to look ashamed, even if he's still unrepentant. “I expect this cut and edited by Friday. Kise, Aomine.”

Kuroko’s vaguely thankful that he doesn't have to edit any of the footage, even as on-screen Kise and Aomine start bickering about something like the shape of the sweets and which one tastes better. It's almost painful to watch them and the tension between them, the way Kise almost visibly wilts when Aomine says something thoughtlessly rude. Momoi catches his eye and they both exchange pained glances, even as Aomine kicks Kise’s foot under the table, prompting a startled yelp from Kise and Midorima's subsequent glare.

Kuroko hopes they’ll figure it out soon, but then again, he’s dealing with the two stupidest personalities they have.

He should probably brace himself for the long haul.

**Author's Note:**

> This got terribly out of hand so uh, here. Have this fic.
> 
> Kudos and comments appreciated. <3
> 
> You can find us on twitter [here](https://twitter.com/sannlykke) and [here ](https://twitter.com/ewagan).


End file.
